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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Adulthood (07/30/09)

TITLE: Adulthood-a child's view
By janice moorcroft
08/05/09


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“Grown-ups are strange.” said Molly.
“You’re telling me!” sighed her brother.
They were sitting in the tree, in what the local kids called “The Ropey” due to a rope swing from one of the branches of an old knarled tree. It had been there for ever, according to street legend... “My great aunt Annie played on that swing in 1910……..”
“I mean, this morning…what was all that about? You know, all that shouting at dad just ‘cos mum lost the car keys?” asked Molly
“Yes” pondered John, “anyone would have thought dad lost them, and they’d just been put on the shelf.”
“We’d get grounded if we behaved like that!” observed Molly
“And did you hear them arguing about dad not putting his clothes away?” asked John
“Their bedroom was so untidy yesterday….I don’t know how they dare tell me off!”
“Yes but your room smells funny too said Molly, “mum calls it ‘eau-de-teenage boy’”
“Can’t say I’ve ever noticed” said John “…at least it’s not pink!”
“Well, I like pink” Molly scowled.
“When are they back from the hospital?” John asked looking at his watch.
“I don’t know, they’ve been there for ages again today, do you think gran’s dying?” she asked, suddenly growing serious.
“I don’t know, but mum was crying again last night, she said something about her needing palliative care……..”


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This article has been read 229 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Jackie Wilson08/06/09
I liked your story and the dialogue. Started out humorous but ended on a sad note. I think I liked the humorous beginning the most.
Seema Bagai 08/09/09
An interesting slice of life in this piece. Don't be afraid to write close to the maximum word count of 750. I wanted to learn more about these children. Some scenery or mood descriptions would add to the well-written conversation.
diana kay08/13/09
I liked the dialogue and these childrens characters. I think looking at adults fromthe childs eye view was an original and interesting take for this topic.
I look forward to reading more of your work!