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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Adolescence/Teen Years (07/16/09)

TITLE: Outside, Looking In
By Marijo Phelps
07/16/09


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Nose pressed to glass
It was cracked,
Outside
Looking in

They are there
Always together
Laughter leaking
Me looking in

In the hallway
Between classes
She said hi
Me, looking on

Elections coming
So I’m honored
Nodded only
A candidate's pawn

Wrong sweater
Older skirt
Cousin’s castoffs
Me looking away

Friday mixer
Rhythm records
Invisible me
Sideline sway

Lunch table laughter
Sorry, seats taken
Shoulders slumping
Moving beyond

Silly whispers
Fitting nowhere
In crowd’s cruel
Existence, non

Rude roughhousing
Crass humor
Butt of jokes
Face of red

Bully barking
Fingers flipping
Unjustly jostled
Monday's dread

Parties planned
Classmates going
Invitations passed
Not my desk

Adolescent unkindness
Focused on us
Never a letup
Most grotesque

Gradually I see
Standing there
Hands pressing glass
Outside too

She’s not weird
Who shut the door?
Closed face on
One who’s new

Stammering me
“What’s your name?
Where’d you move from
Glad you came…”

Blinking eyes
A tear or two
“My name’s Sue
Glad to meet you!”

On that day
We had a start
Guileless girls
With broken heart

Friendship deep
Between us grew
Where’d I have been
Without meeting Sue?


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This article has been read 528 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Markeala Dotson07/23/09
i loved this article. Everyone has had at least one of these moments described at least once.
Lisa Johnson 07/23/09
I found some of my best friends on the outside looking in. Wonderful story.
Laura Manley07/24/09
Been there more than once in my life. Good job!
Deborah Ann Belka07/24/09
My Sue was a girl named Carol. Very real and true to life. Keep on writing!
Allen Stark07/27/09
Relatable. It's obvious when one writes from the inside out.
Patricia Turner07/28/09
A very nice and simple little poem that expresses such emotion and sad truth, ending in grace and triumph. Please, please, keep writing!
Bryan Ridenour07/29/09
Nice poem on the hardships of being an outsider. Well written. Keep writing!
Verna Cole Mitchell 07/29/09
I liked this very much--a lot said in a few well chosen words about the awkwardness of a teen not in the "in" crowd.
Sara Harricharan 07/29/09
This is excellent, the rhythm and the words you chose for it. You captured some good feeling and emotion, in so little. Amazing!
Mona Purvis07/29/09
Thought provoking and raw. So true for many of us.
Mona
Betty Castleberry07/30/09
You made me feel what your MC was feeling. I liked this. Nicely done.