The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
06/08/09
Painful emotions scream out the wrongs that you want righted! I see the scared little girl as I read your memory pictures. Praise the Lord you have found peace and love, gentleness and security.

Your article will touch many hearts, I'm sure, as too many share in like events when they were young. However, many share in finding their heavenly Father, as you have. You're heading in the right direction with the "revenge"; leave it to God.

I am pleased to see how you have written this, helping the reader see the past and bringing them into your present. Keep writing; it's a good exercise and you're doing well.



06/08/09
Good job here! I wanted all of that bitterness and all of the "bad things" to stop, but you did well bringing this to a close. Thanks for sharing!
06/10/09
i like the title to this peice because it brings a feeling of hope of somethibng sweet and gentle in a very painful place. Thanks for sharing this. I would like you to have not split it up into four line verses as it is mostly free verse and reads more like a prayer/mediation than a poem. It has no need to rhyme as it is more powerful with the lines as they are and my opinion is that longer "verses" would be fine and even vary the number of lines before a break. Well done though!