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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Retreat (as in quiet time away) (08/01/05)

TITLE: Place of Solitude
By Brandi Roberts
08/03/05


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She collapsed in exhaustion from her short run through the trees, as the heat of the day intensified the bruising throughout her body. Digging through the soft, green moss, she pulled out a rusted, metal box. This was her haven, her getaway, the only place she could find true solitude. After every bruise, every black eye and broken bone, she came back to this place. It gave her peace, a feeling of warmth. She opened her box, and with tears streaming down her cheeks, she pulled out the dirty, worn book. It's pages brittle from age, the book carried the peace and joy that she needed to get through every beating. As she gently turned each page, tears dripped down her cheeks. This was love, everlasting, undying love, if only he could understand it.

---

He had done it again, even after he promised not to. How many more times would she have to tiptoe around his minefield of rage? How long would there be glass shards of unspoken violence under her feet? She was so careful with him, but she had to tell him this time. She was going to have their child. Flying into a rage, he cursed at her with words never uttered before, as he drove all his anger into her with his fists. He screamed words of worthlessness and hatred towards her, each syllable causing more pain than the rampant blows to her body.

When his energy was finally spent, he sunk to the floor in a tearful heap, begging for her forgiveness. She stared down at the pathetic man her husband had become and sighed. She knew if she wanted to get out, she would have to forgive him, console him. She whispered words of forgiveness to him as she helped him to their room. He was soon fast asleep. Knowing she couldn't be gone long, she hurriedly made her way out the front door and into the forest.


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This article has been read 954 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Katherine Douglas08/08/05
what a sad story... I feel her pain.
Debra Brand08/08/05
Wow! That's a situation I don't understand but thank God that He does!
Linda Watson Owen08/09/05
Dramatically and realistically told! Many women, all too sadly, can relate to this story.
Melanie Kerr 08/11/05
I liked the contrast between God's love which was enduring and uplifting, and the man's "love" for his wife which was so destructive. Well written.
dub W08/11/05
Powerful, realistic, and meaningful. Good writing on a tough subject.
Sheila Arnott08/11/05
Beautifully written.
Shannon Redmon08/11/05
This took my breath! Good writing!
Jan Ackerson 08/11/05
I like the way your story begins and ends in the same place. (Watch use of it's / its). Well-written.
Julianne Jones08/11/05
You've captured the mood well and written a well-constructed piece on such a difficult subject. The short length of the entry made it even more poignant. A longer piece would have been too depressing. And you tied it in nicely with God's perfect love. Keep writing. Thank you.
Shari Armstrong 08/11/05
Powerful and heartbreaking.
Lynda Lee Schab 08/11/05
Intense and well written. Nicely done.
Blessings, Lynda
Suzanne R08/12/05
How very sad, yet how beautifully written. It really sums up the idea of 'retreat'.
Sally Hanan08/12/05
Yes, it eflected the theme exceptionally well, but I'd have much rathered her running away to a more permanent place of comfort and safety.
Beth Muehlhausen08/13/05
Painful and too, too real. I liked your intro there in the woods, the retreat spot, and then the flash-back to the horrible scene. Very effective.
Phyllis Inniss 08/15/05
Short, poignant and sad.