The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
05/28/09
This would be easier to read and understand if quotes were used. Perhaps you could expound on what Cave saw above the earth?

Nicely ended! Sun was confused when it went down to see Cave's world, as Cave realized its darkness had disappeared. Crafty!
06/01/09
Reads very much like an ancient fable--I wonder if it'd be even better in prose? Good job--keep writing!
06/01/09
*smile* I love this narrative poem! The ending was perfect.