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As the sun was beginning to rise, my tears began to dissipate. It was like somehow the dawn of a new day could erase all of the sorrows from the night before. With a new resolve, I step outside to right the wrongs of the day before. Unfortunately, the rest of the world did not wake up with that same resolve.
As I stand on the doorstep of rejection, pleading for forgiveness, I realize that the door is never going to open. I’m alone. I’m in pain. I’m lost and not sure I even want to find my way out of this new place I find myself in. Wandering along the old familiar streets, everything suddenly looks strange. What used to be signs of comfort have turned into roads full of mockery. Each step I take forward is a reminder of the tortures of nights past.
But then I feel an awakening in my soul. My folly of the night before, bad as it may be, has led me to my newfound freedom. God’s whisper to my soul, “Why do you make things so hard?” from the day before were finally coming into focus. Yes, I did push myself into the lap of rejection, but that isn’t where I have to stay. The freedom that I have been pursuing for years is mine for the taking. And take it I shall. I’m not rejected, I’m loved. I’m not a failure, I’m more than a conqueror. I’m not a slave, I’ve been saved by grace.
This journey to freedom has been filled with broken relationships, deception, hurts, and bruises. Not until a bad situation brought me to brokenness did I realize that this long journey has been traveled in vain. The freedom has been mine for the taking all along, all I needed was faith to believe that I have already been freed.
Yes, the dark night and stormy dawn of the morning have been bad, but the realization that my chains are gone is oh, so good. Had I not endured the bad, I would have never pursued the good. I’m thankful for this journey and for a God who is willing to heal the bruises of those who choose to live through the bad to discover the good.
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