The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
02/13/09
Excellent story! Be careful of omitting letters such as the 'd' in shared. This makes the reader stumble and backtrack. Otherwise, it flowed very well!
02/14/09
your story flows well and has a satisfying conclusion with a clear message. The connection with South America is there but not as strong as it needs to be for this week's topic. Your research on the eruption comes across loud and clear - a little more local colour on Columbia or Peru would have gone a long way.