Gosh! The big red London buses have been suspended!
Even in the ĎBlitzí this never happened. BA has cancelled all short haul flights from Heathrow and trains are severely disrupted between London and the South East. The FSB is telling us that three days of disruption will cost small businesses 3 billion pounds!
Whatever is going on? This is 2009 and a few flakes of snow have brought parts of Britain to a standstill. And whatís more, BBC News 24 is obsessed with this weather thing!
Someone emailed to say that in Canada the temperature had to reach minus 45 degrees Centigrade before anyone panics. I thought this may be a slight exaggeration until I remembered my friend Suzie, a regular Benidorm Beach hot house plant, who took a short trip to Canada and never came back! Well, apart from to collect her toothbrush and a few more essentials. She had met and fallen head over heels in love with a Mountie, and happened to mention that where she was living, the ground was too hard to bury the dead.
Brrrr! Now thatís COLD! All those Canadians out there must think us Brits over here are a real set of wimps! But thereís one thing for sure, Iíll be knocking it off my Ďplaces to see before I dieí list!
Now if I had feathers this would be an entirely different story. I have a heartfelt desire to become a Canada Goose!
I picture myself being a member of one of those enormous flocks of wave after wave of regular ĎVí formations that fill the autumn skies as they head South in advance of the approaching winter. What a stupendously, breath taking birdís eye view of the coastlines and mountains I would have.
They donít need to book the flight in advance or arrange stopovers. As far as I know they donít pack spare undies and a sandwich for the journey. But yet they are overwhelmingly human in all but their ability to fly, bob effortlessly on the surface of water and subsist on a diet of grass.
Perhaps they could teach us unfeathered birds a thing or two.
Did you know that Geese often mate for life and can pine to death at the loss of their mate? They are aggressive only when protecting their young, and being devoted parents they never leave their Goslings unguarded.
Neither are they racist birds, as they happily mix and interbreed with all other types of Geese, and if thatís not enough to win you over listen to this. Migrating Geese in Canada have been known to allow hitchhikers! Smaller birds have occasionally been found on their backs.
Now how big hearted is that!
Having extolled the virtues of, and advantages of becoming a Canada Goose, I must point out that the Urban Goose, naturally attracted to parkland, especially if thereís a stretch of water nearby, can be mucky little beggars! Feeding almost nonstop on turf grass and handouts from the public, naturally the amount of pooh they produce is directly proportional to the amount they eat. The rest Iíll leave to the imagination!
Do Canadian Geese fly over Niagara Falls? If so Iím definitely going to hitch a ride. If not I wonder if I could do an Annie Edson Taylor and take a ride over the Falls in a barrel. After all Iím three years younger than she was when she became the first person to do it in 1901. You have to take risks sometimes or else youíd stay home and do nothing.
Jesus told us to take no thought for our lives, what we should eat and what we should wear, but he also gave us a smattering of common sense so I expect we were meant to use it!
Hmmm! Perhaps Iíll give that one a miss too then!
Likewise He made those lovely Geese to do Goosey stuff, and we humans to do His stuff. His will! Thereís no point in being envious of a Goose when God made us in His image, to have fellowship with Himself, to be a light to others in this dark world.
Heíll be back one day soon! He promised and so itís got to happen. It wouldnít do for me to be bobbling about in a wet barrel, or travelling south clinging onto a hospitable Goose. Iím meant to be ready and waiting with my lamp trimmed.
Ah well! Does anyone have a recipe for Goose Pie?
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