The Official Writing Challenge
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Poor Alyssa! What a story! I'm glad she was found in the end, there were certainly a few good moments of suspense in here. Nice job! Glad it had a happy ending!
02/06/09
Intense! I can remember something similar happening to me, although it was in a store and my little boy wandered off. I can relate to the range of emotion this mom had. Very well done. Realistic!
02/09/09
This is really good. I would have liked to have been told just exactly where Alyssa had been all that time and what had happened. We were left with several questions but 750 words doesn't give you much space for everything. Well done.
Good story. As a dad with four youngsters, this kind of story really hits home. Thanks for the happy ending!
Very nice job! I liked Marian's inner struggle with who to blame .. with needing to blame someone, and her guilt at being warm and comfortable.

The ending is sweet, but you don't need always wrap your story up in a bow, so to speak. I think it would also work well to end with "sobs of relief wracking her body."
02/10/09
Great suspense story. I agree about ending with the sobs. But then, of course, you would have had the wrong title.

I enjoyed this read.
Great story. I don't suppose you've read 'The Shack' before? - I wouldn't want to spoil the story for anyone who hasn't read it (and I'd recommend that you read it if you haven't! It's amazing!) but this story definitely remind me of that book. Well done!
Great story. I don't suppose you've read 'The Shack' before? - I wouldn't want to spoil the story for anyone who hasn't read it (and I'd recommend that you read it if you haven't! It's amazing!) but this story definitely reminded me of that book. Well done!
02/10/09
A story that any parent can identify with, that's for sure.

My only recommendation would be to reconsider the title--it's best not to use familiar phrases, and this one doesn't really capture the suspense of your story.

Good job especially with the characterization of the mother.
I'm going to disagree.
I like the title and I don't think ending at the sobs would be a good ending.
I think this is a very strong Beginner entry. Good job.
02/11/09
Good story. I was reading eagerly to find out what happened in the end, although I kind of knew how it would likely end.
02/20/09
Hi Kellie. I'm running a week late, but just wanted to leave a quick note to let you know your entry "A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words," actually did very well in the Canada Challenge. Although you didn't receive an award, you made it into the Highest Rankings placing 6th in Level 1.

Competition in Level 1 is always very intense, so you did extremely well.

If you'd like to check the highest rankings for yourself, you can find them here:
http://www.faithwriters.com/Boards/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=24328

The highest rankings are posted every Thursday evening on the Message Boards.

You definitely deserve a pat on the back. You were SO close! Well done. With love, Deb (Challenge Coordinator)