The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
05/22/08
The overall structure of your piece is solid, moving the reader naturally through your points in an easy manner. I found myself a bit put off, I guess, by the easy transition from one kitty to another to the kitty as a companion in place of husband. I am sure that processed was filled with much more agony than you show and I would have liked to have you focus on one of the transitions in further depth instead of summarize all of them. Okay, I admit it--you made me want to know more about your experience, which is good writing!
05/23/08
Cats can be such good companions, can't they?
I would have enjoyed some description of the cats' personalities instead of the visit to the vet and shelter.
I've developed an allergy to cats. I miss having one around.
Well done.
You give very clear details in your writing. The step-by-step "recipe" format left little room for the reader to feel much emotion about such emotional issues of loss and replacement though. Include some personal reaction/emotion from your MC to help pull the reader in to your story. :)