The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
05/15/08
Thanks for showing how your life was enriched by following a family tradition of inclusiveness. It is a sort of Christian fellowship where all are gathered together in love. I like how you look back and see that God placed you into the situation to teach you some lessons but I can see you feel blessed by it all.
05/16/08
What a lovely tradition to have for a family! It must be wonderful to share all those special moments and memories.
05/21/08
It's always fun to know how others include their extended family in their celebrations.

The flow of the story was a little confusing. I would start with a solid outline to make sure the events are in a good order and well organized.

Otherwise, it was a nice look into your life.
05/21/08
Very nice. I particularily liked the payoff at the end where the dream/desire comes true. I think you can move smoothly between exposition and background to the Story You Really Want To Tell without actually saying so. Trust in the flow to take us there. I was certainly happy to arrive. Thanks for sharing.
07/19/08
Family is important and we need to love and get along with our earthly families because the family of God is forever.
First, thank you for your comments on Shadow Man. I appreciate your taking the time to write them. I don't have the extended family cameraderie described in A Family Tradition, so I was compelled to discover all about yours. The technical aspects will improve as you think about sentence structure and punctuation in the proof-reading process. Blessings! Bella