Home Tour About Read What's New Help Forums Join
My Account Login
Shop
Save
Support
E
Book
Store
Learn
About
Jesus
323
  
Click Here For Detailed Site Navigation

The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge

BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN

INSTRUCTIONS

how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level

ENTRIES

submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners



Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.





TRUST JESUS TODAY

TRY THE TEST



Share
how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Mother (as in maternal parent) (04/24/08)

TITLE: A Cup of Cold Water
By Janice Fitzpatrick
05/01/08


 LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE
 SEND A PRIVATE COMMENT
 ADD TO MY FAVORITES

It seemed like just yesterday that the ambulance dropped my mom off to this tiny rehab-nursing home, after spending over twenty days in the hospital, most of them in ICU.

Yet, it had already been almost seven weeks and still no sign of recovery. I pushed the green entrance button by the door and slowly took in a deep breath. Hospice was meeting me here, so were bits of hopelessness.

She was resting when I entered the room and I gently brushed her cheek with my hand. “Mom, I’m here, it’s Laura.” Her eyes slowly opened sleepily.

“Maybe I could get some cold water please, I’m so thirsty.” Her voice quivered.

I scanned the top of her nightstand to see that it was empty and leaned in towards her ear so she could hear me. “Mom, I’ll be right back. I’m getting it now. I brought you some bottles of water and they’re in the kitchen.” “Okay, she meekly acknowledged.

The once sparkly eyes gradually met mine but now were dull and lifeless. Lips which usually smiled or occasionally tightened when something displeased her not only drooped to the left side but were drawn up. I kissed her graying head. “Love you mom.”

Stirring thickener in everything she ate or drank had just become part of taking care of her for the last several weeks since she had difficulty swallowing. The problem was mom hadn’t wanted to eat much of anything in the hospital and the nursing facility.

At least she did love her water.
I peered down at the gaunt figure clad in the tent sized nightgown and choked back my tears.

As I placed the cup of iced liquid in her trembling hands, watching her enjoy each sip, memories came flooding through my mind.

When my brother and I were young every Monday evening was officially chocolate pudding night. Out of breath from playing we followed the tempting aroma to our kitchen where mom was waiting with a bowl of the creamy fudge concoction and a large glass of ice water to wash down the richness.

What a combination, warmth for the tummy and cold for the palette.

“You make the best pudding in the world momma”, I chorused through mouthfuls of delight.

Actually everything she did seemed “best”. From staying up with us while we worked on homework with offerings of refreshments and backrubs, to reading to us and teaching us about the one she had faith in, mom had a way of serving and every act of love was indeed like a cup of refreshing water.

As I waited for the hospice nurse to talk with me, my attention was drawn to just outside the window where a few mourning doves splashed about in a whimsical but thought provoking mouth shaped bird bath, occasionally pecking at the wetness.

I was reminded of Revelations 3: 16. “So then because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spew you out of my mouth.”

I had studied the interpretations to learn what was meant by the passage. Laodicea, a city found in scriptures, was situated in the Lycus River Valley. It held two vital waterworks, a complex fountain and a tower that transported water by an aquaeduct from the hot springs in Hierapolis.

I began thinking of how mom’s offerings of love had been like the cold water at Colossae, a neighboring city, and even the hot water in Hierapolis that bathed many a weary and worn body.

How many times had she soothed hurts and worries away with her prayers and encouraging words or just a listening ear?

The pipes in the aqueduct system, I learned, often became calcified and so water would be blocked from moving freely.

Christ had asked the church to not be lukewarm or useless but to be helpful, a blessing to the world. I wanted to give back to mom all that she had done for us, to make a difference to her and to reach out to others.

“Thank you for always being there for us, you’re so precious.” I brushed my lips against her satiny cheek.

“I’m still praying and believing for a miracle mom.” “Yes, I am too,” her eyes shifted towards the nightstand. “More cold water please.” I tried to smile. “You can have all you want mom, I brought plenty.”

------------------------------
References: BibleGatway.com
Bibleplaces.com
Rev:3:14-16













.


The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be right now. CLICK HERE

JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.


This article has been read 478 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Janice Cartwright05/01/08
This is very, very good and could easily be an entry from a higher level. The topic is right on and you did an excellent job involving the reader.

I found only one small grammatical error at the beginning, but it is a small thing indeed when compared to the overall excellence of your story.

With offerings like this you will move up quickly.
Yvonne Blake 05/03/08
so touching...so sweet.
I liked the title and how you kept the theme throughout the whole entry.
I'm not sure of the application of the "lukewarm" in this instance. But I understood the use cold and hot water of your mother.
It's so good that you had that special time with your mother.
thank you for writing this.
Carol Sprock 05/03/08
You provided a vivid description of your mom and your relationship with her in such a few words--very lovely. For the paragraphs on the aqueducts becoming calcified and following one seemed to interrupt the flow, instead of contribute to it. You provided a clear enough portrait with the bit on hot and cold water.
Chely Roach05/07/08
This was melancholy but inspiring. Nice piece.
Joshua Janoski05/07/08
This definitely was above a beginners entry. I hope you place high with this one, because it was very well written. You deserve to move up to the next level.

I enjoyed the explanation of the scripture in Revelations and your history on the aqueduct systems. You did a good job of keeping the "water" theme throughout this piece.

Thank you for sharing. I enjoyed this a lot. :)
Dee Yoder 05/08/08
You gave me some wonderful images of care and love for your mom. Learned something, too, about the aqueducts and the significance to Laodocia. Very interesting, and touching.


   
© MeasurelessMedia. All rights reservedTerms of Service