The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
04/24/08
Oh, lots going on in this story, and it feels like you could easily expand this into a book. It took me a second or two to get the names straight (Hee hee) and to sort out who was who, but the writing is great. I would read this if it were a book. You squeezed a ton of details into these 750 words!
04/26/08
I agree. I see a book here as well. Good job!
04/28/08
Wonderful, quirky little romance. Love every character in this very strong entry!
04/28/08
I agree about the abundance of characters--I couldn't keep everyone straight. But I loved them all anyway.

I also agree that this would be a good expanded story. I want to know more about each of the characters.

Well written, and very good dialogue.
Love your descriptions of the location and of the food. Good job and keep writing!
I'm still confused by all the names. But I can see where you're going with the story. :)