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Hi, Phyllis. It’s Gladys. Thought I’d give you a quick ring. Haven’t talked to you in ages. So what’s new with you?...Your nephew is going to be a doctor? Wow! He’s such a good boy. Just a sec. Speaking of nephews, mine’s here and he’s gettin’ ready to leave.
Bye, Lucas. Love ya. Take care. Don’t worry about getting those paint clothes back. There’s no rush. Uncle Albert has plenty more.
Okay Phyl, I’m back…Yeh, that was my nephew Lucas…Uh, what’s he up to? Not much. Going to school in the fall…No, not a doctor…Nope, not a lawyer either…What then?
ALBERT! TURN DOWN THE TV. I’M TALKIN’ ON THE PHONE.
…Oh, sorry, didn’t mean to yell in your ear like that. Where were we?...Oh right, Lucas. Well, uh, gosh, there’s no easy way to say this. Would you believe he wants to be a preacher?…Yep, you heard that right, a preacher…I know, it was a SHOCK for the whole family. First one to be smart enough to go to college and what does he choose? A Bible school, Phyllis. Who goes to Bible school anyway, besides maybe priests and nuns? We don’t go to church much so don’t know who really goes to Bible school...Yeh, he’s one of those Jesus Freaks. Prays a lot and reads his Bible…What’s an aunt and uncle to do? We’re a little embarrassed you know, especially when he prays for the food at our family gatherings. Sheesh. He could at least tone down the passion a little bit. At least he’s not one of those Bible thumpers always trying to get you saved…Your nephew wants to eventually be a brain surgeon? You must be a proud aunt. Now that’s doing something good to help others. And it won’t hurt that it will be helping his pocketbook too…Yeh, Lucas is always helping others. He isn’t going to get rich anytime soon though. I would think he’d want to help himself for a change. Today he’s using some of his uncle’s paint clothes and drop cloths. Said something about helping to paint a homeless mission a couple blocks from our house…Is his parent’s religious? Sure, they’re good people. My sister doesn’t go to church much but she believes in God, I think. Sure uses His name on a lot of occasions, if you know what I mean…Ha! Ha! That’s true. She’ll have to watch her p’s and q’s if there’s goin’ to be a preacher in the family…Did Lucas get any scholarship offers? I don’t know…Do Bible colleges offer scholarships? I doubt it. Instead of giving money away don’t most religious groups try to milk it out of people?...You don’t say? YOUR nephew has a four-year scholarship? Oh my, I would be a proud aunt for sure…Oh, I don’t know. Having a preacher in the family can’t be the worse thing that has ever happened to us. There’s got to be something about the boy to be proud of…What’s that? You don’t say. For real? Ohmygosh!
ALBERT, TURN UP THE TV. QUICK! TURN TO CHANNEL 6. HURRY UP YOU OL’ GEEZER. THE NEWS IS SHOWING THE GROUP LUCAS IS WITH PAINTING THE HOMELESS MISSION…You don’t say? There’s a close up of Lucas? Gotta go, Phyllis. I’M his aunt you know. That’s MY nephew!
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