The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
04/26/08
I was intrigued throughout. Some good descriptions.

I had a bit of trouble following exactly what was going on, but it could have been me.

Thanks for sharing.
Since you have introduced yourself and I know that you are from India, this entry shows a very good command of the English language. I especially liked the phrase which compared the child to "a wingless bird". :)
07/24/08
Good going, Thresia. You kept to the topic, "Uncle", while pointing out a good lesson for everyone. "Don't hold on to what is holding you back. Burn it!"...Since I have read later challenge entries of yours (this being the fourth), I can see your progress in the later ones. In this one you have not broken up the paragraphs, but in the later ones, you have. By breaking a story into paragraphs, it gives the eye a rest and helps the reader progress more smoothly on to the remainder of the story...But besides that, your story is very good. It gives a good insite into how things are in another country...Helen