The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
04/17/08
The past can lead us to make decisions that are not always the right ones; so glad God helped to soften your heart and to lead you make peace with those feelings.
04/18/08
Nice job with framing the esay with the Hallmark card bits.

Work a bit on "showing, not telling." You might consider choosing just one incident and expanding on it, so that you can develop your character (and your father's) more thoroughly.
04/21/08
Some mechanical work in posing the essay will help. Work on the descriptions, and you will go far with your writing.