The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
03/06/08
Very good writing, and a wonderful example of God's timeliness.

I was a little bit confused as to why she slept through Eric getting ready for school--wouldn't he have awakened her? If he's elementary age, it seems like he would have needed her help, and if he's older, he would have known she needed to be up...or maybe I'm missing something...

I like your title, your lively pacing, and your realistic dialogue.
Interesting story. I know it is hard in a short story but the character development could have been a little deeper. Your use of the word "she" did throw me off a few times. I didn't count exactly but I believe you used "she" over 30 times which is a bit repetitive in such a short piece.
This fast paced story kept my attention. I enjoyed Katy's tenderness with her daughter, despite the rush.
I think what grabbbed me, and made me forget to question how the son fit in to the picture, is that I have lost count of the times we have run late and encountered a very recent accident.
03/10/08
Very good example of the week's topic. It would have been nice to see more attention to the description of the character instead of her circumstances (perhaps her thoughts, emotions). However, it was an easy read and quite appropriate.
03/11/08
Good story! Sure makes being late for work seem terribly unimportant ..lol. Looking forward to your next story.
03/11/08
Wow! I wonder how many times God delays us to protect us.
Good descriptions, good dialogue. I could feel her mother's anxiety.
Great writing.
**This SPARKLES**