The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
03/10/08
This is a nice poem. I like this line especially, "He came to save the lost
Jesus made a Royal Sacrifice
All that you must do is pray
A very simple prayer
All that you must do tonight
Is say Lord Jesus come into my life
I want to rest in your loving care."

Good job!
Laury
03/10/08
"Now I rest safely in His care".. i like the contrast with how your MC felt at the begining.
03/10/08
This could go on a bookmark--very nice.

You might want to tweak it a bit for rhythm and meter--try for a pattern of stressed and unstressed syllables per line. It flows better for the reader that way.

Thanks for this short and lovely poem.
03/10/08
Good, brief presentation of the gospel in testimony style. You could leave out an unnecessary word now and then for the sake of the meter, and use punctuation: it helps a staggering meter. Good work.
03/10/08
Nice poem. Good job. :)
03/10/08
Nice poem. Good job. :)
03/12/08
Very nicely done. I noticed one typo - 'King of Kings' not 'or'. I really enjoyed it. Thanks for sharing!