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Topic: Illustrate the meaning of "Every Dark Cloud has a Silver Lining" (without using the actual phrase or literal example). (02/28/08)
TITLE: From Darkness to Light
By Corinne Boback
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Getting up and turning the light on, I saw that I was in a robe. My hair was done and my makeup was on. The bed was made and nothing seemed out of place. Then I saw the ironing board, with the iron sitting there, its cord pulled from the wall socket. My dress was sitting, half ironed, on the ironing board.
I began to recount what had happened. It was Easter Sunday, 1994. I had been happily singing to myself on my favorite holiday as I was pressing the dress I would wear to church that morning. As I began to iron, I accidentally burned my hand. All at once, I was not a forty-three-year-old woman ironing, but a little girl playing at my mother’s feet as she ironed. She yelled at me fiercely to get out of the room. I tried to get up, stumbling as I gathered my toys. It was not fast enough to suit her. I felt a slap on my cheek as she jerked me to my feet. What happened next is incomprehensible to most people. She laid my tiny hand on the ironing board, and momentarily set the iron on top of it. I remember hearing myself screaming as she shoved me out of the room, slamming the door as I shrieked in pain.
I had no recollection of that happening to me as years went by. It was repressed so far into my subconscious mind, because there was no way I would ever want to remember it. Now, almost forty years later, an accidental burn triggered this memory.
But what happened to my day? It was morning when the burn occurred, and it was now evening. I had lost the entire day, caught somewhere in the hidden, darkest places of my subconscious mind.
I called my sister the next morning, who tearfully verified that the incident had happened. Now I had a decision to make. Would I choose to try to remember more of a life of apparent abuse? Or would I shove this horrific flashback down once more into my subconscious mind, hidden again with the rest of my childhood memories?
I decided to go back to the dream world I lived in. It was an easier world, believing the lies that I had a normal upbringing and loving parents. I could not shatter that dream with the things of my past. If this was a taste of that past, why would I want to expose myself to more trauma? What purpose would it serve? I discarded the event as a “one time happening” in my mother’s moment of anger on a bad day, and went on in my dream world for a long time. My past was a darkness I did not want to face.
But Jesus Christ, the Light of the world, had other plans for this tortured, grown up child. He would not let me forget! More flashbacks continued from 1992 until 2001, when my world as I knew it began to crumble. As I began to fall apart, the Light, the Truth, and the Way came to my rescue! He sent me to a church and to pastors who could help me through the healing process. In that process, I discovered His will for my life. I would one day help others face what had been hidden in their subconscious minds for so long. Only in finding truth can one discover the reason for their very being. God had a plan for me before the foundation of the world, and it is a plan that I am fulfilling because He made sure I found the truth of my life. In a way, one might say that I lost my life, that He may help me find it, through the awesome power and love of Jesus Christ! And what a glorious life it now is!
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