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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Illustrate the meaning of "Actions Speak Louder than Words" (without using the actual phrase). (02/21/08)

TITLE: The First Bite
By Kay Ramos


Born of a man seems hard to believe,
But thatís how Godís plan was fated.
Immaculate and holy was the conception of me,
From Adamís rib I was created.

The Lord gave us everything weíd need and
A lovely garden in which to dwell.
Our days were joyous,
Our nights filled with peace,
You could say that our lives were quite swell.

Some time passed, though not too much
And we never crossed the line
Of Godís laws which kept us innocent
Until a thought stirred up in my mind.

Now this idea that had come about
Was not born of myself.
The scheme that I was planning out
Came from the prince of the air himself.

That crafty devil,
I did not know
Was who that serpent was.
He wanted to have us betray the Lord
Destruction was his cause.

He tempted me to eat of the fruit
That grew on the forbidden tree.
He said that we would become as gods,
This I surely wanted to see!

The fruit was just as any other
But the taste kept me wanting more.
I just could not contain myself!
So I told the one I adore.

I talked with Adam about the wonderful fruit
And asked him to have a try.
At first he was apprehensive
But I finally got him to comply.

As we partook of the marvelous fruit
We looked with newborn eyes.
The two of us were naked and shameful,
Much to our surprise.

Just then we heard soft footsteps
And a voice that called our names.
We feared the Lord who searched for us
So we hid from Him in shame.

When our Creator came to the knowledge
Of the thing that we had done,
He was wrought with anger
And evicted us from our home in the sun.

He cursed us all to suffer
Not just one of us
But all three.
And it all started with the bite I took
Of the fruit of the forbidden tree.


(Based on the book of Genesis, KJV Holy Bible)

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This article has been read 358 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Dee Yoder 03/03/08
Really nice imagery in this poem. You brought the truth of Eve's one little action, that affected the whole of humanity, in your entry. I like the image of her just wanting to "see" what it would be like to in charge. What a tiny temptation, with eternal consequences!
LauraLee Shaw03/04/08
Good job bringing this story to life!

If you will visit the message boards on "hinting day" (Mondays), you will get a lot more people to read your entries and comment on them. It would be great to have more people enjoy your work. :)
Joshua Janoski03/04/08
Very nice poem. I didn't quite see the topic in this one, but I might just be overlooking it. Regardless, it is a great piece of writing, and I appreciate you sharing it.
Lyn Churchyard03/05/08
A great way to tell about the fall of mankind. Very well done indeed. A couple of awkward spots that could easily be fixed by removing one word in a couple of verses. Other than that... wonderful!
jodie banner03/05/08
Great representation of Eve's point of view.