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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Illustrate the meaning of "It's No Use Crying over Spilt Milk" (without using the actual phrase or literal exampl (02/07/08)

TITLE: "Let's Make a Deal"
By Amy Kuncaitis
02/12/08


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“I’ll give you Eight-thousand five-hundred but that is my final offer.” Dave tried to keep his best ‘Poker Face’ as he looked the salesman in the eye with no expression.

“Come on buddy, you know I can’t go that low.” The used car sales man’s eyes shifted and his body language conveyed anything but integrity. “I’ll tell you what, I can do, Nine thousand five hundred plus free oil changes for a year. That is my very best offer.” The salesman continued to press obviously wanting to move this car.

“Sorry, no deal, come on son, it looks like we will need to find you a different car.”
Tyler tried to look past his dad’s ‘Poker Face’ to see if he was seriously going to walk away when they were so close to getting his dream car.

Dave gently pulled his son’s arm and they walked away.

“Dad, I can’t believe you let it go!” Tyler was fuming as he hopped in the passenger seat of the rather old, slightly rusty car the family had been sharing for several years. “I have been saving for that car for like five years; I know that was the exact car I want.”

“Buckle up son.” Dave looked over at his son in the passenger seat and knew exactly what his son was feeling. “Listen Ty, I know you think I am pretty mean right now but you have to trust me, that car was not worth nine thousand dollars, you would have regretted buying it.”

“I regret not buying it.” Tyler mumbled as he slouched down in the front seat and crossed his arms in protest.

The loose, rusty exhaust pipe clamored against the underbody of the car, as they sat silently the entire thirty mile trip home. Tyler was thinking of a way to get that dream car, he knew he would have to make a deal his dad would not be able to refuse. As they pulled in the driveway, Tyler sat up a little straighter, uncrossed his arms and proceeded to strike a deal with his dad.

“Ok, I’ve got it. How about we give it one week? We go back to the dealership one week from today and if my…the car is still there, we get it for the ninety five hundred and if it is gone, I will let it go and continue to share this old junker with you and mom with no complaints. Is it a deal?”

“It’s a deal son.” Dave extended his hand to his son and they shook on the deal.

Exactly one week later, Dave and his son rounded the corner, into the used car parking lot. Before Dave could put the car in park, the car caught Tyler’s eye, it was still there in the exact spot they had left it a week ago. Tyler flew his door open and made a mad dash for the car. Dave followed close behind his son. Tyler cupped his hands around his face to peer in the window of the red Mustang, the interior more pristine that he had remembered.

“Couldn’t stay away huh?” The familiar salesman put his hand on Tyler’s shoulder.

“I want it.” Tyler reached to his back pocket for his checkbook and wallet.

“Not so fast there buddy.” The salesman put up his hand to signal Tyler to stop. “Uh…well…the car is having engine trouble…it’s not completely blown yet and…well…it might be able to be fixed or…” Without skipping a beat, the salesman turned toward the second parking lot of cars and pointed to a much older, much less attractive car. “Hey, we got a beauty over there I can set you up with for the same price.”

Dave looked over at his son who was grinning at the salesman’s obvious tactics. “Don’t worry about me,” Tyler shrugged his shoulders “I think we will stick with what we’ve got.” Tyler gave the hood of the Mustang a pat and walked away.

Tyler gave his Dad a little wink as they walked back to their car, “Too bad huh? Something tells me there’s not a car in that guys lot that was meant to be for me.”
Dave chuckled. “Something tells me you’re right.”


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This article has been read 434 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Yvonne Blake 02/14/08
Oh, the joys of buying that first car! Good character development. I could see the salesman, father, and teenage son.
Good writing.
Nancy Quinn02/17/08
Great story and great writing! Thanks for sharing. God bless :)
Marlene Austin02/18/08
Nice job building your characters. Good writing. :)
LauraLee Shaw02/19/08
God was good to the son with this lesson. I'm thankful he didn't buy the car only to have it fall apart. Good story.
Debbie Wistrom02/19/08
Dialog rang true and the pace was good. Good job with this father and son, keep up the good words.
Jan Ackerson 02/20/08
Very nice, Amy! He could have had to learn that lesson the hard way...
Sara Harricharan 02/20/08
Quite a deal there! I'm glad that he didn't get the car and then have to deal with all the car trouble. this was great with the ending though. I liked how he was able to 'grow up' a bit and see more how none of the cars were right for 'him'. Nice job. ^_^
Verna Cole Mitchell 02/20/08
Great lesson learned in this well told littel story, and no crying over spilt milk.
Joshua Janoski02/21/08
I liked this story. Fun characters and dialogue. I'm glad that they didn't get ripped off by the car dealership. Keep up the good writing!