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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Illustrate the meaning of “Don’t Try to Walk before You Can Crawl” (without using the actual phrase or literal example). (01/17/08)

TITLE: Provin’ Before Movin’
By Deborah Caruso


One day a peaceful valley was stuck in the middle of a feud going on between two settlements. The hill on one side was occupied by outlaws, and on the other hill, God fearing folk. The outlaws had squandered their resources and had now set their sights on Bell Hill across the way.

These outlaws picked a giant desperado to intimidate the folk of Bell Hill, Delaney Amos. He was meaner than a snake and toted a big gun. Delaney dared the folk on Bell Hill to send out their best gun, and if he was able to outdraw him, they could keep their hill.

Day and night Delaney hollered across the valley, “Are all of ya’ll yella? Ya’ll be wonderin’ where that God of yers’ went when we get a hold of yuh.”

He was dead on, about the men on Bell Hill being yellow, that is. Every last one of them was. Even the sheriff and his deputy were. They knew Delaney’s reputation and were scared stiff. The people finally got together and put up a reward for anyone that could put down Delaney Amos.

Eventually a fair skinned boy named Aden volunteered. He didn’t take a liking to all of the cursing coming from the other hill about God. “We have just cause to defend our honor. Are we God fearin’ folk or ain’t we? Seein’ that none of ya’ll will stand up to him, I will. He don’t scare me a bit. Why, I’ll feed him to the buzzards. Them heathen over ther’ need to be taught a little respect.” He said pointing at the country church.

“Why yer just a youngin’, what experience could yuh have?” The sheriff asked.

“I tend to my paw’s sheep. Why, I’ve wrestled with plenty of varmints wantin’ to scatter ‘em or snatch one of ‘em away. I’m not scared of that foul-mouthed bandit over ther’, bearin’ in mind, I got God on my side, and He’s on all of yers’ too. All they got over ther’ is a big ole’ bully.”

“Well, I reckon you’ll be needin’ these, son.” The sheriff said as he offered Aden his holster and gun. It weighed the boy down so that he couldn’t even walk.

“These won’t do at all. I haven’t proved ‘em yet.” Aden said as he took off the holster. He then took out his slingshot, and picked up five smooth rocks from out of the creek. He held one of them up and said, “But this I have proved. Many a wild wolf has ended up with one of these right betwixt its eyes.” He then bravely headed for Delaney.

When Delaney saw that a boy was coming for him, he sneered and began to curse. “Dare send a boy to do yer fightin for yuh! The vultures will have full bellies today.”

“That’s what you think.” Aden said as he took out a rock. Before Delaney could draw, Aden slung the rock at him, fast as lightening. It knocked the gun clear out of Delaney’s hand. He went for the gun, but saw that Aden had another rock aimed right at him and was ready to launch it.

“Yuh better think twice before pickin’ that up. The next one is goin’ right betwixt yer eyes.” Aden warned.

Somehow, Delaney believed the boy meant business and he raised his hands up high and said. “Why you little runt, their sure nough must be somethin’ invisible backin’ the likes of you up. Perhaps ther’ is somethin’ to prayin’ and such.”

When Aden returned, the sheriff asked him, “Whose yer paw, son? That was mighty brave of yuh.”

“I’m the son of yer new preacher, A.W. Webster. Aden Webster at yer service, sir.”

All marveled at what happened beyond the valley, and from that day on not a soul missed roll call at the country church; not the folk of Bell Hill; nor the outlaws who repented of their wayward ways that day.

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Member Comments
Member Date
Sally Hanan01/24/08
Cute version! You have a very creative mind.
Joy Faire Stewart01/24/08
This was creative and a delight. Enjoyed the take on "David."
Yvonne Blake 01/25/08
(smile) Nice take on an old story! Good use of dialogue and dialect, although there are a few misspellings.
Good job...keep writing.
Mary Hackett01/25/08
I like it! It was daring of you to use a backwoodsy tone--that's hard to pull of confidently but you did it with grace.
Joshua Janoski01/30/08
David and Goliath was my favorite Bible story as a child. I loved your Wild West take on it! This is one of my favorite entries this week! Keep up the imaginative writing.