The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
01/10/08
What a beautiful poem!
It seemed like I was listening in to a private conversation.Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Some of the metering was irregular, too short or too long, but the rhyming was great.
Keep writing.
01/11/08
Very personal and sweet.

It may be a bit long for this type of poetry--readers sometimes get caught up in the sing-songish rhythm. I like to advise poets to be brief, and if anything, to add more poetic elements: imagery, metaphor, simile for example. Check into a few of those, and see what you can do with your next poem.

I enjoyed "eavesdropping" on this prayer time.
01/12/08
Thank you for sharing this. Often I too wonder when I don't see results in those I pray for. Thanks for this reminder that God does hear and that our time in prayer is not wasted.
I really like the thought of approaching Father together with Jesus. Thank you for that.

I would suggest that you add more imagery to this poem, to make it even more encouraging. Let me know if you'd like some help or any tips...