The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 488 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
10/18/07
Love the ending, and I feel as if I know Sara; you did a great job showing us her anxiety.

The only thing I'd suggest is giving us more about how she'd been different "lately." What is the cause of her transformation? Here, it almost seems as if it's accidental.

My heart goes out to the Saras of this world.
10/20/07
Your ending was so poetic and creative!
10/21/07
This was a very good ending and I liked the way it left the conclusion up to the reader. A very good description of this girl and I did feel as though I knew her. Nicely done
10/23/07
Thank you for your sensitive writing on the fear of "not fitting in." I have found myself in those situations, having recently moved to a new town, and trying to find where I "fit" in this new area. You've captured the essence of those fears in this piece.