The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
10/19/07
You have some VERY insightful and scriptural principles built into this article. One suggestion might be that you find a proof reader or someone who can help you out grammatically before you submit. That way, the reader isn't distracted with that instead of hearing your wise teaching.
10/20/07
I like the phrase "the deep truth that is in the breaking of the bread..."

It felt as if I was dropped in the middle of this piece, since it began with "Suddenly, He..." and I didn't know immediately who "He" was (a pronoun without an antecedent), nor what action I was in the middle of.

Lots of good stuff here, just a bit of tweaking in order.
10/22/07
Very insightful and knowledgeable. A little polishing and this would be a great devotional. A tip which really helped me with writing is to read it outloud. (I print my draft out and read it to anyone willing to listen even if it's just my 4 cats!) You have alot to get across here and it's important to get your point across clearly. Keep up the great writing, I can see that God writes through you, treasure your talent.
10/24/07
This piece has lots of promise and your skill shows through. I agree with previous opinions. This is a good start. Keep writing!