The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
Cute story. Good thing he took matters into his own hands and called 911!
09/13/07
Really cute story, get some problems with POV cleaned up and put in quotation marks and I think this would make a winner for sure. Love the story line, welcome to the puppy pen.
09/15/07
Creative story!

Take a look at your first paragraph--your first 4 sentences all have a very similar structure. Easy to change things up a bit, and that's a minor quibble; this is a good piece.