The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Good for Lucy!

Be careful of run-on sentences, and make sure your dialogue sounds realistic for each speaker.

It'd be great to have health projects like this in all our schools!
Such an important message for kids to hear!! Lucy's dialog sounded a little stilted--even for a 'formal teaching' voice, but I thought Max (his voice made me smile) and Susan sounded a little more natural. GREAT message to wrap up in fiction! Keep writing (fiction) and your dialog will soon flow smoother. Good job!! :-) Hugs!