The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
09/08/07
Good for Lucy!

Be careful of run-on sentences, and make sure your dialogue sounds realistic for each speaker.

It'd be great to have health projects like this in all our schools!
09/08/07
Such an important message for kids to hear!! Lucy's dialog sounded a little stilted--even for a 'formal teaching' voice, but I thought Max (his voice made me smile) and Susan sounded a little more natural. GREAT message to wrap up in fiction! Keep writing (fiction) and your dialog will soon flow smoother. Good job!! :-) Hugs!