The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
09/08/07
You definitely have a compelling voice, and a style worth refining.

This is difficult to read with its unconventional capitalization. I'm not sure if some of the other "errors" might be intentional, to add to the mood and style of the piece...

Look at other examples in the Advanced and Masters sections, to see the more typical format here--you may get more readers and more comments that way, and your writing deserves attention.
This could be a very powerful piece, except the formatting made it a little hard to follow. You definitely have a skill worth honing though. Keep writing!
This could be a very powerful piece, except the formatting made it a little hard to follow. You definitely have a skill worth honing though. Keep writing!
09/12/07
There is power in this story. It would help it's readability if there were more paragraph breaks and capitalization.

Keep writing!