The Official Writing Challenge
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Date
09/06/07
Nice job. The end felt a bit inconclusive, but the discriptive spots were great.
This was heartbreaking. Your characters were very bold indeed, especially in their faith which they needed when all other reasoning failed them.

"Bodies lay strewn on the cobblestone streets and a river of blood flowed through the crevices." Just excellent, excellent. You had quite a few one-liners in the piece that caught my eye.

Beautiful and sorrowful. Good luck!
09/07/07
This was very good writing, and I could hardly stop reading it. I do not think that the lack of a definite ending is a problem, since there would obviously be more to come. However the second part of the story would probably fit better into last week’s fearful, so it could do with a few more examples of boldness near the end.
09/12/07
Moving piece, but is it Biblically sound?

You've painted a picture of a schizophrenic God here, two-headed...one that says one thing and does another.

Your victim starts by saying, "Your will be done Lord"; what follows after that is horrific, the loss of husband and child. You end by implying it was all a refining lesson of God. Who would honestly want to believe in this God you painted?

God isn't the author of our problems..sin, disease, death, but the solution. We live in a cursed world because of Satan and man's free will to choose. How about we stop hanging that around God's neck and put the blame where it belongs? You give absolutely no mention of the true villians of this story.

I'm sorry, but it makes me cringe to see Christians writing in this manner. Writing for the "emotions of it" but little Biblical foundations.

My suggestion to you is that you and the Spirit search the Truths out in the Bible on this matter. Be careful what you write if it pertains to the things of God. He's clear that He doesn't want to be misrepresented.