The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
08/31/07
What a touching and tender story of grief and comfort! The little girl's fear is very understandable, and I love the words her Father in heaven spoke while she sat on His lap.

One suggestion I have is that you space between paragraphs to make your piece easier to read.

I really liked your ending with its message of God's love and care for even the littlest ones! Good job! :)
09/03/07
Kleenex! Where is my Kleenex box? Between reading this and listening to Robert Pierre in my ear I am about to drown! (On Faith Alone I Stand is my favorite song by this singer) Any who! Great writing, very good job painting your story for the reader.

Well done!
Oh! Such a gem! I have to confess it.. It made me cry... It captured my heart... tnx for sharing! Great piece!
09/05/07
What a beautiful story. This would make a wonderful children's book. Even the title drew me in.
I loved the way this was written and the message it sends. I especially liked the way the trust in the Heavenly Father was established at such a young age, allowing the child to grow in faith and confidence. It shows God truly cares. I agree that the spacing between paragraps would make it easier to read.
Great Job!
09/05/07
You drew me in with your description of the pain the little girl felt. This MUST have been adapted from a real life experience. LOL
Excellent, keep me posted when you write more!
Oh! Words fail me. You captured my heart as well. Thank you for this. It's a poignant reminder that we all need to crawl up into our Father's lap.
09/06/07
Beautiful story. Very inspirational. I loved your title. Great take on the topic. Nice work!