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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Confused (08/16/07)

TITLE: The Bullet Hole
By Douglas Sowers
08/21/07


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While traveling across the Midwest, I found some decals that mimicked bullet holes. Arriving home in California, I ruminated about what chaos I could cause with these three decals. One was a dud, but the second I put on the passenger window of our car, and waited.
My family was used to such antics, and often staged their own hijinks themselves. Fortunately, my brother was carpooling to work with an older neighbor. This scientist looked at the bullet hole, felt the solid center, so started theorizing about how the center remained intact. My brother, knowing that the decal was a fake, assumed that his fellow passenger was referring to the spot in the windshield. His response that the window had recently been hit by a rock startled the man. Having assumed that the window had been hit by a bullet, he now had to account for the perfectly circular shape. It took about 5 minutes of high powered scientific theorizing before they realized their foolishness. When my brother laughingly told us of the confusion, I knew that I had to use the last one wisely.
Visiting a High School girlfriend, I tried to talk her into putting it on her parents window. Being rather staid, she was understandably reluctant. I had the time to persuade her, though, since we had to wait for the living room lights to be turned off. Slowly, oh so slowly, I persuaded her until she became enthusiastic. Soon the lights were off and we crept up commando style. Since any rustle would have alerted the watchful parents, we quietly inched past the bushes. We lightly wet the decal and softly mounted it on the window. After squeezing out the bubbles, we peeled off the paper backing. The decal began to tear, which would have ruined the illusion, so we wetted it further and waited. Carefully removing the paper, we fixed the tear. Barely suppressing our giggles, I escorted her to the door. Then I bid her goodnight.
She made sure that she was the first up the next morning, opened the curtains to make that window visible and sat at the table to watch. As her older sister walked down the steps, she spied the bullet hole. Outraged, she stormed into the kitchen and began theorizing about when it happened. Then her father descended down that stairs and also spotted the offensive decal. Also deigning to check the hole out, he joined in the hubbub in the kitchen. He began questioning who would have fired the bullet. Then her mother joined the fray and my girlfriend struggled to maintain a straight face. Soon her mother’s disparagement of the out of control neighbor children was becoming too much. Finally, when an expedition was organized to confront the unruly family, she decided that it was enough. She confessed her role, but they had to feel the hole to be convinced. Fortunately, chagrin won out over anger, and soon they were chuckling.
Shortly thereafter, my phone rang with the happy news. As I listened to the recitation, my grin kept growing broader. When I hung up, I thought, “Yes, confusion reigns. My job here is done.”


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This article has been read 428 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Jan Ackerson 08/24/07
This is funny!

If you decide to fiddle with this some more, consider enriching it with dialogue.

Really cute story.
Patty Wysong08/24/07
What a fun story!! Some dialog would really add a lot of 'color' to the telling. Wouldn't it have been fun to be a fly on the wall that morning?! :-)
Beth LaBuff 08/27/07
This was really funny and I enjoyed reading of your "escapades". You gave a good clear detailed description.

One question...Does your girlfriend's family still talk to you? :)
Dee Yoder 08/28/07
Oh, clever! This is a funny story, but I bet you would've loved to see the action yourself!
Polish this up with a little editing, and it will really shine. :)
Julie Ruspoli08/28/07
Very funny. What you have is well writen and you did a good job telling the story and keeping it interesting. I think it would be even funnier with either more explanation of the characters expresions, or explain the characters more, for example, explain the 'scientist' more. Keep writing.
Joy Faire Stewart08/28/07
I love you humor. You have a gift for storytelling. Good work!
Joanne Sher 08/28/07
I enjoy your voice - I also agree that dialog and some description of the people's emotions would strengthen this. A fun read.
George Parler 08/28/07
This was a funny read. I enjoyed it.

As already mentioned a bit of dialog in the characters would have great. Also, this may be just my personal preference, consider line spacing between paragraphs. Large blocks of text are hard on the eyes. Just a thought. Good job and keep writing.
Mark Bell08/29/07
Great story! Reminds me of some hijinks played out by some military buddies I have. One suggestion, though. work on your formatting. Those are terribly long paragraphs.
Janice Cartwright09/25/07
My oldest son, practical joker extraordinaire, would love this. I better not tell him though or he'll be out looking for those decals. :)