The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
08/02/07
Thanks! Your story exemplifies mine. How could you have known?
08/02/07
I like the way you don't tell the reader that the mother of the speaker has died until the middle; it's a nice unexpected surprise. Good emotion throughout. Be careful to proof read for some errors like too, rather than to.
08/03/07
I grabbed a box of kleenex this time before started reading the "sad" stories, boy am I glad I had them for yours. This flowed so well! I thought this was very well written.
08/04/07
I like your writing style, with its artfully omitted conjunctions.

Be careful, though, of sentence structure--there are some run-ons and fragments here.

This is raw and real, with good pacing throughout.
08/05/07
Very powerful and real expression of sorrow. Very well written