The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
06/09/07
Oh, this is wonderful. I loved the imagery in the 2nd half of the story.

The only suggestion I might make is to keep the imagery throughout the whole story. I realize word count probably kept you from adding more, but you should consider expanding this. Tell us more about their lives as a soldier and nurse. Tell us about their teenage years.

Wonderful story. Keep writing!

Good story for children. Unique use of names.
06/11/07
The images of heaven and Jesus are touching! I think older children would like this story.