The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
05/18/07
Interesting, thoughtful piece. Technical note - you changed tense a few times. I liked the optimism in the ending.
05/23/07
Very intriguing story! You explained how they created a utopian planet, except how they managed to wipe out "intoxications and addictions." It sounds like a "perfect" world with "perfect" people, but without God as the Head. How could that ever really be? Thought-provoking! :)