The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
I really appreciated the hope and repentant spirit that your narrator showed upon hearing the Word.

Your writing shows tremendous promise, and will improve vastly with a few easy fixes--attention to capitalization, and to conventions of punctuation and spacing. You can write--there's no doubt about that--but people will be distracted by the format.

Keep writing--I look forward to reading more in the future.
Nice, I like the hope and the determination the narrator displays in the end. You have the basic knack to put together a story; this will improve with time and practice. There is a need for greater attention to, spelling (I'm terrible at this) capitalization and punctuation. Keep writing I'm looking forward to reading more of your work.
Good story content. Proofreading is a MUST for any writing. In proofreading you will find most of your own errors.