The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
What a happy description of becoming a grandmother! You write with lots of emotion, your feelings really come through and make the reader feel with you. I have a couple of suggestions for you to consider: The first paragraph reads more like a preamble, sort of explanatory. Perhaps either work those lines in some where else in the body, or cut it. I don't think it is necessary to your piece. If feels like the real story starts with the second para. I think the title causes the reader to prepare for a sad, unhappy story. You might change it to something upbeat, like God Gave Me Cherries on Top, or something like that. It's really a very lively, happy piece.
I tend to agree with Vicki's comments. The first paragraph set the tone a little differently than I would have expected. I do think you did a great job with your imagery and descriptions. I really liked the theme of remembering to forget. My kids are just entering high school so I have a little bit of time before I get to enjoy those cherries on top. But, when the time comes, I will remember this little gem of yours. Thanks
Oh, this is such a sweet piece. It really resonates with me. How beautifully put and how fortunate is your grandchild to have a grandmother who relishes "grandmotherhood" so very much. Touching piece.
I can definitely relate. I love my children with all of my heart, but oh those grandbabies are a special treasure for which I will always give thanks. They captivate your heart, and you are hooked from the moment they are born. Thanks for sharing this.