Hire
Writers
Editors
Home Tour About Read What's New Help Forums Join
My Account Login
Shop
Save
Support
E
Book
Store
Learn
About
Jesus
  



The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge

BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN

INSTRUCTIONS

how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level

ENTRIES

submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners



Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.





TRUST JESUS TODAY

TRY THE TEST



Share
how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Reading (01/25/07)

TITLE: Altered Ending
By Libby East
01/28/07


 LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE
 SEND A PRIVATE COMMENT
 ADD TO MY FAVORITES

Kimberly curled up in her favorite chair with a hot cup of coffee and her favorite book. This was at least the tenth time she’d read it. Filled with romance, mystery, humor, sadness and suspense, it was the first book she’d read all the way through. This book had opened a door to a whole world of delightful adventures that could be discovered in all kinds of books.
Whenever she found herself looking for a good read she returned to the old favorite. This day was made for reading; outside it was rainy and cold.

Rebecca and Todd sat close together discussing the future in soft voices. “I can’t wait ‘til we can be together.” Todd said holding Rebecca’s hand. Rebecca smiled up at him sweetly. Bending toward each other their lips met. The warning bells sounding in Rebecca’s mind were ignored. “We’re gonna get married.” she thought. “It’s okay.”

Resting the book on her lap, Kimberly thought, “If only she knew what was gonna happen.” Closing her eyes, she rested her head on her hand. When she opend her eyes a beautiful blond woman sat in front of her. “You wanted to speak to me?” the woman asked. Kimberly was shocked to realize she knew exactly who the woman was. Of course it was Rebecca. Delighted to have the opportunity to set the girl straight and save her from her impending misery, Kimberly began. “You’re thinking about sleeping with your boyfriend.” This statement was met with a look of total shock.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. And besides we’re getting married.” she flashed her diamond engagement ring as she said this.
“Don’t sleep with him.” Kimberly warned.
“How did you know I was thinking about it anyway?”
“I’ve read all about you.” she held up the book. Rebecca showed her surprise as Kimberly held the book out to her. She took a few minutes to scan the pages. “It’s all there.” Kimberly said. “Including the ending.”
“So what happens?”
“You sleep with Todd. You get pregnant and he gets killed in a car accident. You wind up sad and alone with a child to care for.”
“So, I’m not gonna marry Todd?” Kimberly shook her head no. “Do I marry anyone?”
“You meet a man named Greg who sweeps you off your feet. He loves you but you push him away for fear of burdening him with your child. He can’t wait forever, so he moves away taking with him your only chance at marriage. He is God’s best for you but you refuse to accept it. The choice you make to sleep with Todd shapes your life. Don’t do it.”
Silent tears slid down Rebecca’s cheeks as she exited the house. Kimberly picked up the book and began to read where she left off. This time the ending was different.

Rebecca and Todd sat close together discussing the future in soft voices. “I can’t wait ‘til we can be together.” Todd said holding Rebecca’s hand. Rebecca smiled up at him sweetly. Bending toward each other their lips met. The warning bells sounded in Rebecca’s mind and she pushed Todd away. “It’s okay baby, we’re gonna get married.” Todd said as he pulled away for a minute and then went back to kissing her. After pulling away again, she gathered her things.

“I know. I want to wait until we do. Think about how special that night will be.” She bent to kiss him as he sat on the couch and he grabbed her hands.

“You’re right. That will be special. We can wait two months right?” She nodded her head in agreement and he stood. The couple embraced and then said goodnight with a brief kiss.

Two days later, Todd was killed in a car accident and before the first anniversary of his death, Rebecca was married to Greg who was the man of her dreams.


Kimberly closed the book with a sigh. How great it felt to help Rebecca make the right decision. “What if in real life someone new how the choices we make will effect our future.” she thought. “You do that don’t you God.” she marveled at the thought and realized that God also tries to caution us to make the right choices if only we would listen. Vowing to listen closer to God’s cautions she stood to refill her coffee mug.


The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be right now. CLICK HERE

JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.


This article has been read 439 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Kristie Derksen02/02/07
Nicely done!
Mo 02/02/07
Well done & creative. I really liked the last paragraph.
Jacquelyn Horne02/03/07
Nice touch. I would that we could all rewrite our stories.
Donna Emery02/04/07
Ahh.. to have a book predict our future would be nice but the ending reminds us that if we follow God's leading we won't have to wonder about what to do. This is very nice work.
Jason Smith02/05/07
Good story.I liked the ending.
Allison Egley 02/06/07
Oh, I've wished I could talk to the characters in the book also. I feel like yelling at them, sometimes. "No, no!" Hehe A few minor punctuation errors, but nothing major. I also wish we could have a book that tells us the effect of our choices. Great story. Keep writing.
Patty Wysong02/06/07
Well done. How often have I picked up an old friend for some comfort reading?! I liked how you worked a lesson in us!
Sara Harricharan 02/07/07
This was pretty good! I liked the idea, extremely creative, and very well expressed. You asked for constuctive criticisim, so I'll add my two cents worth of advice. I noticed a few grammatical errors like missing puncuation (check for question and quotation marks) The shift from the character in the book to real life was a little choppy, but believable. I wish I could have known a whole lot more about the characters, but they were very well done. Use more expressions and descriptions next time. Show instead of tell.
Keep up the good work! ^_^
Julie Arduini02/07/07
I love the creativity here. A great message.
Myrna Noyes02/08/07
Very imaginative piece with a good message!