The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
01/11/07
Great dialogue here--I could see and taste the food from the very specific and exotic descriptions; they made my mouth water!

Enjoyed hearing John's anxious inner thoughts, though at first I thought they were Lisa's. Some indicator that John was thinking might be helpful the first time around--also thoughts are more obvious as such if italicized.

A delightful story!
01/12/07
Cute story that made me hungry reading it! :) I looooooove the smell of garlic frying!

I agree that it would have made things a bit clearer to have the thoughts italicized. It was fun to "hear" what was going on in John's mind while cooking!
01/16/07
Dude! An enjoyable story and I loved the dialog. I hope John gets a date!