Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Desire (01/17/05)
TITLE: I Remember Laughter and Joy
By Kathy Ellis
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It was not my plan.
It was not my desire.
Where did I go wrong?
God! What did I do to deserve this misery? I canít even remember what it feels like to be happy. I know I used to be happy. I remember laughter and joy.
Now.. I fight tears all day long. At home, at work, everywhere I go. I am miserable. My relationship with my husband is horrible. We walk around each other like we are pieces of furniture. My kids are doing everything they can to destroy themselves. All I want is for everyone to be OK. I want my marriage to be right. I want my kids to do right. I want my work to be right.
But no... everything and everyone has to be at odds with what I want.
Jesus! Even You have turned away from me. I look through Your Word for help for my kids and all I find is Your anger. Your scriptures condemning me. What did I do? You are supposed to help me. Where is Your love? Where is Your comfort? Where is Your joy?
Lord! I need You desperately! Help me, please. Please restore the joy, the joy of my salvation.
That was me. That was my life.
Till Jesus answered my prayer.
He restored the joy! He did it instantly! After all, it is His joy ... not mine.
He restored my children! He restored my marriage! He wiped away the tears and the pain! He changed my life forever.
What was wrong, He made right.
His plan for me.
His desire for me.
His place for me.
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