Diane tugged at her robe as she shuffled around the kitchen. Drip, Drip, Drip, Chooooo. She twisted her head towards the coffee pot. Ah! The coffee's done! She got a mug and filled it up with the hot, thick mud. Ah! This smells so delicious. She got a nice big whiff of her coffee…she wanted to melt. I should start making breakfast. This could be interesting since I’ve never cooked before.
Diane got out a skillet and put it on the already hot burner. Lets see, I need eggs... she slowly walked to the refrigerator and got four eggs. Eggs, Check! She took one egg and cracked it against the skillet. Oops...She hit it so hard that it shattered and the whole egg, shells and all went inside the hot skillet. Diane grabbed a spatula to get the mess out of the pan, but it was too late the egg had already cooked and started to burn. She turned the burner off and started to scrape the egg out of the bottom of the skillet.
BEEP… BEEP…BEEP. She shrieked at the loud sound and covered her ears. The smoke detector! Ugh.
She heard a familiar voice, she twisted around and saw her husband, Max, standing in the doorway with a towel. Diane moved out of the way and sat down. She kept her eyes on her loving husband as he turned the fan on over the stove and whipped the towel over the smoke detector. Soon, everything had calmed down and Max was getting coffee.
Diane huffed out loud, trying to get his attention, but it didn’t work. She walked over to Max and stood next to him and cleared her throat. “I’ve learned something today...” her eyes shifted. Her husband looked at her waiting for her to continue. “I…can’t cook.” Her cheeks suddenly felt warm.
Max looked at her. “I’ll say,” he said with a smile.
Diane’s mouth dropped and she punched him in the arm. “Thanks a lot!”
“Your quite welcome.” He laughed as he hugged his wife.
“Well I did it for you.” She hugged back.
“Thanks…I’ve always wanted burned eggs.” His smile got wider.
“Grrrr!” She glared at him, which just made him laugh harder. “Why must you tease me?” She followed her husband to the table.
“Cause you look so cute when you’re teased.” He took a sip of his coffee.
“Humph” she looked towards the stove and the mess she made. “Well then, if you think you could do a better job cooking breakfast, then by all means.” She put out her hand as if she was a “Price Is Right” © model.
“I don’t think so.” Max glanced at the stove and back at Diane.
“Why?” She persisted.
“Cause…I can’t cook either.” He laughed.
“Ugh! You’re no fun!” She pouted.
“Oh, I think I’m plenty fun!” He picked up the newspaper.
Diane got up and walked over to the fridge, staring inside she couldn’t find anything to fix. “I’m hungry and I don’t know what I want!” She moaned.
“How about cereal?” her husband suggested.
“Yuck!” she rolled her eyes. She looked in the freezer and grabbed a frozen pizza. She walked over to the stove and turned the oven on and it beeped as she pushed buttons.
“Ah! Take cover! She’s playing with the stove!” Her husband joked.
She turned around to find him under the table. “Ha! Ha! Very funny…” She threw an oven mitt at Max and missed.
“Wow, she can’t throw either!” He came out from under the table just as she started running at him.
“You are you so mean!!!!!” She pushed him.
He grabbed her and held her in an embrace. “Yup, but I love you even though you can’t cook.”
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