The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
12/08/06
Your review, critique, and comment's on this writing is welcome! Just tell me why you "did" or "did not" like it! I need the critique and comments!
Thank you
and God bless!
12/08/06
Very good title – it stood out amongst the others. You had a lot of thoughts in this piece, probably too many for one story.:) To make this piece more powerful, maybe you should have expanded on this sentence:

We must remember that while some may seem like super heroes they are just like us.” Remember to “show not tell.” I enjoyed your descriptions of Florida’s climate and people in your opening. Keep writing, I hope to see more of you!:)
12/10/06
I like your informal "voice" in this story. I like the way you expressed your opinion.
Keep writing!