Previous Challenge Entry (Level 1 – Beginner)
Topic: Parent (11/16/06)
TITLE: Always a Child
By Marie Fieldman
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I remember the days when my dad was a prince, and my mother was an angel. Those were the days when I believed I could depend on them to know the answer to my every question, and to meet my every need. They loved me, protected me, taught me; they were the objects of my adoration. I wondered when I would grow up, and be as smart and capable as they were. It seemed so far away.
When I was a little older, I began to see, sadly, that they were indeed people. They made mistakes, and couldn’t answer all of my questions. They often disappointed me. I determined that I would not mirror them, but be a better parent.
I was surprised as a teen, to see my parents fail as much as they did. They were sometimes stuck without the solutions to any of the problems I faced. Sometimes they even needed my help and encouragement to keep on keeping on. I looked over their shoulders for a view of what they faced. The image of an unfriendly world with no answers made me shrink back. My parents did not have it all figured out, and they couldn’t always protect me. They had experience, though, and that counted for something. I wondered that I never realized how far they must have been before I was even born. I felt that I must have been miles away from being grown up. I was an almost-adult, but I felt like a child, incapable, naïve and frightened.
When I look into my daughter’s trusting eyes, I can’t help but think of her future. I’m told that I am an adult, but I feel like a child left with something too advanced. I feel small, unintelligent, incapable… but I am not afraid. I know there will be rough times, times when I will struggle to keep her safe and happy, but I am not shrinking back.
I’m not alone. I have a King on my side. He is more powerful than any earthly prince, and higher than any angel. What’s more, I know I can depend on Him to meet my every need and handle my every question. He loves me, protects me, teaches me; He is the object of my adoration. In many ways, I have come to realize that I will never be a grown-up.
Parents are indeed people. We will make mistakes, and we won’t always have the answers. However, there is One who would be a father to all parents. He never disappoints us if we trust Him. We are useless without Him.
I thank God that my parents were weak humans. It forced me to call on Him, when they could do nothing for my pains, heartaches, fears and hardships. I am still learning to trust His answers instead of trying to figure things out myself.
Someday, when my little girl sees that I am weak, when a fear of helplessness strikes her, I pray that she will depend on my Father. With Him, she can face anything. I will be happy to have poured the best years of my life into her, if I know that she has learned this.
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