The Official Writing Challenge
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11/16/06
Awesome first paragraph, a great "hook" for your readers.
11/18/06
Well done. Brought tears to my eyes.
11/23/06
A beautiful, beautiful story, ruined only by a few lacking comma's, and overly long sentences; It doesn't take away from the story itself - but makes for an awkward read. Just a helpful hint - but the story was great! Keep up the writing - you have the talent and potential...so never give up! Great story - On Topic!