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By attending a grief support group and reading an enlightening book called Life After Loss by Bob Deits, I now understand that grief not only follows the death of a loved one, but other major losses, too. I have come to recognize the deep emotional response I experienced in other periods of my life, equaled the grief of my son’s death. I didn’t have the benefit of a support group or the light of a knowledgeable book to help me with the grief work of personal loss.
I suffered a six-year alienation from my only daughter, which included separation from my granddaughter.
I was threatened with the loss of my home, in which I consciously put down roots, where the Dogwood tree was planted when Jimmy died.
I had to make the heartbreaking decision to leave my husband after 39 years.
I endured a troubled relationship with my aging mother, who I now realize was grieving the loss of her home and her independence.
The anguish was so deep in each circumstance. Tears flowed unbidden and uncontrollably. I felt like I had lost everything worth living for in this world.
But, God’s River of Life runs through it all. That is why I can say today that I know His “joy unspeakable and full of glory.” Because, when I cried out to Him in my despair, He came to me with all that He is, and taught me that Jesus is all I need.
He, alone, fulfills all my expectations. He comforts, strengthens, and reassures me. Only He could heal my broken heart. He keeps me company, rejoices in me, and fills me with encouragement. I am in His presence by reading His word, through prayer, and spending time with others who love Him. He is with me as I trust in His provision and have faith in His promises.
God’s River of Life runs through my own life; ever changing, ever flowing, as an endless river.
A trickling waterfall of most pleasant memories has come cascading down to the present from the past. Sometimes, gently ricocheting off the not so pleasant stones anchored in the streambed below. Yet, each of them is an integral part of the endless river’s course; encompassing its deafening roar, its dizzying eddies and coming to rest calmly in smooth, peaceful pools; while upon it, my life travels on.
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