The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 633 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
08/18/06
There is much to be commended here, not the least of which is the gradual revelation of the true nature of his "relationship." Cleverly done. A few more edits to catch minor grammar and spelling errors would help a great deal. One that particularly stood out was the very end--should be "que sera sera."

This is excellent writing.
08/19/06
Excellent writing!! This completely captivated me. I agree with all of Jan's comments as well. Wonderfully done!
08/22/06
It takes a bit to trick me so I figured out the 'person' from about line 4 on, but it was well written.

Your imagery was good, and there were some good lines in the piece.
Interesting. You had me guessing to the end. Good job