The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
03/14/05
I liked this - their camping gears pulling down their strength. This would have been much better if you had lengthened the story and fleshed it out to a conclusion. I'm struggling to see what it has to do with shrewdness, the required topic for this week.
I agree with Sally here. You have this great little story going, building us up, we know the first man is someone that has to make the decision, maybe makes it wrong, but still we are left feeling he has some answer and then it ends. I would have loved to see this with a conclusion that brought shrewdness to full circle.
03/16/05
What Happen?
Where is the rest of the story. Well next time.
03/17/05
great start...
01/25/06
This is an old piece (somewhat an experiment then...hahaha). But thanks for your honest critique.