It's easy to critique the works of others and get your work critiqued. Just follow the steps below:
1) Post your first piece.
2) You must then critique the work of another member to post another piece yourself.
3) For each critique you give, you earn 1 credit that can be used to post another one of your writings.
4) You can build up credits to be used at another time by giving critiques to others.
Our Daily Devotional
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.
TRUST JESUS TODAY
This right here is my "Eminem" rap. I wanted to keep it Christian, but test the limits and say some edgy things. I'm hoping this will either ruffle your feathers or make you stand up and say TELL IT! Otherwise, let me know if it's not quite that strong yet...
It’s the “Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave”
Turned the “Land of the Fee and the Groan of the Knave.”
You can tell me I’m young and I ain’t got no respect
For the elders that RAISED ME to rebel and reject…
All authority. Yeah, I heard about Woodstock.
About The Who, The Doors, Lynard Skynard, and all the pot.
Freddy Mercury and Sir Elton John’s Crocodile Rock.
And I grew up next door to wigga’s bumpin’ Tupac!
And what happened to the rap scene when Tupac got shot?
The West Coast said “We lost the greatest poet we got!”
All the stocks for the west coast news stations dropped
They cleared his cell block. Thugs replaced their faith in the crack rock.
You can tell me I’m too angsty, too obnoxious and proud
Cuz I love a heavy-metal Jesus and I’m playin’ Him loud!
But there’s one thing I get from listening to Him instead of you
And that’s the dirty, blunt-force, brutal, honest, eye-opening TRUTH…
That the time couldn’t be too far away from now.
Will I live to see the day the whole world bows down?
2012- Some people say it’s gonna’ be the end.
I say, “I’ll go whenever God decides to take me, my friend!”
Cuz’ this life don’t seem like it’s got nothin’ for me.
I don’t wanna’ receive all this decadence I see on T.V.
I just want a job that pays my bills in 40 hours or less
And a Christ-centered woman between the sheets to relieve some stress!
And you can say that I’m just lazy like every other boy
Who shows up late for work and treats your body like a toy.
And you can say that I’m asking for my life on a silver platter
(You can keep talking all day, if you think it will matter…)
But what can you say to the ring in my tub
That won’t go away no matter how hard I scrub?
And what can you say to the dirt in the pores
Of the hair on my arms that I washed twice this morn?
And what can you say to the sweat on my brow
That tastes like oil and salt when it falls in my mouth?
And what can you say to the snap in my wrist
When the muscles tighten-up and I give it a twist?
It sounds like this… (physical demonstration) *click*click*click*
And that’s the sound of my heartstrings snapping for you!
It’s the way that love feels every time that I lose!
It’s the sound my soul makes when it singes the page!
It’s the knuckles that break when I give in to rage!
And inside of it all, there’s a ten-year-old boy
With a Pearl Jam cassette and a room full of toys
And a mouth full of bread that keeps Mommy away
And you WONDER why I cry when I’m alone today?
And you wonder why I SCREAM when you show me your nails
On your fingers and toes, with little glitter details!
And you wonder why I can’t sympathize with your lack
Of desire to scratch this here itch on my back!
READ THE POEM that I spent four hours writing for you!
And say somethin’ more than “Yeah, I like it. It’s cool.”
If you don’t know what to say, then go back to grade school!
I swear, the way you write makes you look like a fool!
You confuse “no” with “know,” “to” with “too,” “their” with “they’re.”
And I can see your master’s degree hangin’ on the wall over there!
And it BURNS in my stomach every time that I see
A typo in the sales pitch of some dumb company
Who has MY resume collecting dust on a desk
That belongs to a secretary who got the job with fake breasts!
And everyone’s so surprised that our nation’s depressed?
Bear with me, cuz I got some important ideas to stress!
There’s no difference between people who can’t read and don’t.
There’s no difference between students who can’t learn and won’t!
But somehow God saw it fit for a poet to grow up poor
While y’all illiterate nit-wits graduate from schools I can’t AFFORD!
And there’s that old phrase America keeps telling me:
“It’s the Home of the Brave and the Land of the Free.”
But from what I see, it’s all about the people you know
And the amount of dollar bills you can line in a row!
So gimmie somethin’ more than a black president to believe
That I’m not just a slave to a nation deceived!
Gimmie FINANCIAL RELIEF! And if you can’t then TELL ME
How long has it been since America was free?
(Come again… SINCE WHEN has our freedom been free?”
The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
REMEMBER, this is a Critique Circle. Please try to give a critique to receive a critique. If you do not want to give any critiques, you can use the REGULAR ARTICLE SUBMISSION area. If you are unsure about how to critique, please use the CRITIQUE GUIDELINES and CRITIQUE TIPS.
To view your critiques that you receive on any writing, login to your account and click "CRITIQUE CIRCLE MANAGEMENT" to view all of your critiques and edit each piece. Then, click "VIEW CRITIQUES" next to the article title to view critiques on that piece. Comments on all of your writings when using the Critique Circle will not be displayed publicly as regular and writing challenge articles. They can only be viewed by accessing them from your account.