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The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
THE CRITIQUE CIRCLE

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CRITIQUE CIRCLE

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CRITIQUE GUIDELINES

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It's easy to critique the works of others and get your work critiqued. Just follow the steps below:

1) Post your first piece.

2) You must then critique the work of another member to post another piece yourself.

3) For each critique you give, you earn 1 credit that can be used to post another one of your writings.

4) You can build up credits to be used at another time by giving critiques to others.
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TITLE: Pieta: Tammy and Andy
By JoAnne Potter
10/02/07
 SEND A PRIVATE COMMENT
 SEND ARTICLE TO A FRIEND

A friend of mine has a son that came to her through marriage who is particularly attached in a very special way. This is about them, but something is missing. I don't know if it's too cryptic or vague in an attempt to be poetic, or if it's something else. It started out as prose, but seemed to make a better poem. Help!
He follows you like an echo,
not attached, but always close.
Arms in your circle,
head on your hip,
he claims a mother he doesnít own.

He wears your soft colors,
matching outfits bought apart.
Watching through blue sparkle,
under soft wheat,
he inherits across hearts rather hand blood.

He learned your gentle way,
where quiet smiles crown light touches,
in bloom and rock,
fragrant and constant,
knowing love in patient hours.

He came as a wedding gift, partial orphan,
your husbandís child,
son but not son,
yours, but not your own,
finding his mother blessed among women.
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