TITLE: If Only My Mom or Someone Had Told Me? #2 (c)
By gene hudgens
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"As a healthy teen I really love life and living a Christian life. I will will always try to appreciate ideas and advice to assist me to grow stronger."
Friendships can be very heartbreaking and confusing for girls and boys. Each of us make new friends as we bounce the ball trying to keep old friends.
(We must always remember that "Who we are with is far more important that where we are")
As each of us gets older each year we are growing up and lerning to stand on our own feet. That means that each of us will disagaree with our friends on issues, especially if a friend pressures us to do things we do not want to do. That is natural and its good.
Talking and expressing our feelings, as we try to be honest with our selves and our friends, is what friendship is all about. Normally this makes an honest friendship easier and better.
(Learn everyday to express ourselves in a positive way. "When we sincerely believe in a friend; tell them." All friends enjoy feeling and hearing our approval and encouragement.)
When we respect ourselves we learn that it isn’t necessary to give in when we feel strongly that we are right. A worthwhile friend will respect our right to say no and not give us a hard time. Its important to always give our friends the same respect. None of us should be afraid of losing a friend because we say no.
Friends should never feel that they must agree with what the other says, but it is very important to carefully listen to what a friend is trying to express.
Our young years are a time for learning. We are more successful learners when we we have several or many friends to learn with. Talking and sharing is a wonderful learning process. We learn about ourselves, the kind of friends we want to have and be around, and about people we do not want to associate with.
Respect is a key word in any worthwhile friendship. “Self respect” is the most important part of the respect. We all need to learn early to demand respect from everyone, especially friends; whether they are boys or girls. We are stupid individuals if we do not demand respect from others.
In life we will have many types of friends; casual, amigos, cater-cousins, parents, siblings, confidants, acquaintances, intimate, or a mate. We need to learn to try to truly enjoy all of our friends during our beautiful teen years. We must learn, learn, and learn…without giving up our freedoms or lowering our standards and goals.
We must always remember that we are the most important person in our life in order to get the most out of our precious life. Life is always too short, but none of us know just how short.
We must realize that worthwhile friends are always concerned about their friends. As a friend we must feel concern for our friends and we definitely have a right to expect friends to be concerned about us.
When we feel that a friend has a problem we need to offer our help. We must let our friends know we want to help. We have a right to expect the same in return and be sensitive to allow friends to help us.
We can always be a listener and offer friendship and advice. However, we must be alert to realize that a friend’s problems might be greater than we can handle. We must first realize that a friend’s problems are not our fault.
We must not hesitate to share our concerns with a trusted adult such as your parent, a teacher, or a health care person, even if our friend may be upset with us for involving another person. It is always important that we do what is necessary to protect our friend’s health. Problems such as eating disorders, smoking, involvement with alcohol or other drugs, or possible family abuse at home are examples that required our involvement.
Encourage a friend not to delay calling the National Domestic Violence Hotline at (0800) 799-SAFE if she or he is being hurt or harmed in any way by the person they are dating
If your friend is in trouble in any other way, he, or she should delay in calling the Youth Crisis Hotline at 1-800-HIT-HOME (448-4663) for help. It is even better to be with this friend as he or she makes this important call.
Keep in mind that good communications entertains friendship and listening is the primary element.
Never forget that: We must try hard to be a good friend if we expect to have good friends.
Jesus is our best friend. We must talk with Him everyday.
(c) Gene Hudgens
The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.