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TRUST JESUS TODAY
First presentation for critique. Be as honest as you desire. It's pretty straight forward and no hidden surprises I believe. Originally written with itialics for speaking parts, quotes placed here where needed.
Does the story work though? Thanks and God bless.
"Son, as You predicted we have the order."
"Thank you, Father."
The father gives the scroll to the Son.
_________________________________________ Purchase order: Forty
Total height of main support: 13 cubits
Length of cross beam: 5 cubits
Dimensional: One span by two spans
Light weight timber
"And you purchased and cut the timber to the exact dimensions and length. What type of wood did you use?"
"It is all the lightest, yet with adequate strength, Father. I did purchase enough to make one extra on of the heaviest timber in order to bear great weight: dog wood."
"But it will be so heavy to carry."
"Father, I will have help."
"I wish that I was strong enough to help you, my Son."
"Fear not, Father. You have been faithful in your mission. You will enter into rest soon."
"I do not fear, my Son. Any doubts were dispelled long ago. Will I see you again?"
"Truly, Father, you will see Me again."
A few weeks later:
Centurion: The carpentry is the finest I have ever seen. These are edges are even sanded smooth. The joints are perfect. This skill is fit to be in a palace. Bring that Carpenter to me.
Soldier: Yes, Sir. He has just returned from his fatherís funeral. I shall fetch Him.
Centurion: I am sorry to hear about your father. My condolecenses.
Carpenter: Thank you. He was a great earthly father and I love him. I will see him again.
Centurion to himself: Must be one of the Pharisees. Oh, these Jews.
Centurion: I have admired Your work. You do this quality of carpentry on crosses I would like to see Your other work and present it before the Governor.
Carpenter: Thank you again, Centurion. I am through with carpentry work and have no other objects made. But I will take of your offer to present my works before the Governor.
Centurion: Fine. Let me see your works.
Carpenter: My works are those of the Father. For those who have eyes to see them.
Silence. The Centurion is not sure what to say. Turns to his soldiers.
Centurion: Enough of this gibberish. Finish loading the crosses and pay the Carpenter.
Soldier: Yes, Sir. We have found forty-one crosses though. One is very heavy. It may be too heavy for one man to carry.
Centurion: Load it also; Iím sure we will find someone to carry it. We may have to store it for awhile. But pay for only the forty ordered.
About three years later:
Soldier: Pilate has sentenced another to death. He has been beaten severely. I donít know if He will be able to carry His own cross.
Centurion: Is it the Carpenter I presented to the Governor last night?
Soldier: The same.
Centurion: I remember Him making a cross too heavy for anyone to bear. Fetch it from dungeon where weíve kept it. He will carry His own cross!
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